There's No Place Like Home

I frequently forget how much I love to be home, at least for short periods of time. I forget how much I love rolling down the streets I know so well with the windows down and the music up. I forget how much I love looking at the birds flitting around my backyard, or the beautiful gardens that I used to help maintain. I forget how much I love just being able to relax and not think about the next deadline or thing that I have to do.

Don't get me wrong, I love the busy life...I suppose that's why I keep it that way. But I've been thinking a lot (more) about the "simpler" life...perhaps what my life outside of college will be like. I really enjoyed (and I am NOT a morning person) waking up for Mass today and going to breakfast with a friend from high school. We chatted about simple things for about 3 hours in some little cafe in Edwardsville. It was really nice.

I came home, took a nap, and didn't take life to seriously. That's nice for a change. After dinner, mom and I took a walk around the neighborhood (while praying the Rosary). Again, something I never find time to do, but absolutely loved. I came home, dusted off a bike for nostalgia's sake, and took a spin around the block a couple of times. I can't even tell you how long it's been since I've ever even thought about getting on a bike...but it reminded me of simpler times, when the wind whipping through my hair as I sped down the hills in my neighborhood was about all I could do to get myself out of the house.

I also spent a little time walking around the backyard, looking at the tons of plants that my parents have spent much time laboring to nurture. As I was pruning some hips off a rose bush, I thought about how weird it was that there weren't a ton of bees flying around me yet (it's too early in the season, I suppose). I used to hate bees...they were just a nuisance more than anything. Things like that mark the maturity of a gardener, I'd say: the point when you realize that bees are an essential part of the process, and as such, you're just gonna have to share the rose bush with them. I think there's a spiritual maturity parallel there somewhere, but I'm too tired to dig it out right now.

Lastly, I ask you to pray for the repose of the soul of Bill Fite, the father of my uncle, who died today. He was an excellent man and lived a very long life (I think he was 96). May he rest in peace!

The Death of Osama bin Laden

I know, I know. It's been like a week (or more?), but I feel like commenting on it.

As a Catholic, I was a little saddened by the amount of celebration that was going on with his death. Yeah, he did horrible things...I understand that. But what happened to preaching forgiveness? Jesus said to forgive those who do us wrong, not just those who want to be forgive for it. I can say from experience that it's truly hard to forgive someone who doesn't seem to be at all sorry for what he's done, but God calls us to rise above and be Christian in those circumstances.

After all, God loves Osama just as much as he loves me, right? As a person of equal dignity, Osama and I are equals. And frankly, I want my brother to come into heaven as much as any other person I may or may not know. Shouldn't we all want that? To see as many people in heaven as possible? To have as many people experience forgiveness as God would grant?

One priest who accepted a Mass intention for the late terrorist leader, according to catholicculture.org, caught a lot of flack for it. He simply replied, "Their hearts are troubled because they're thinking emotionally about what he has done, and he has done a lot of evil."

Let's remove our emotions about the matter, and remember Osama's dignity. Let's pray for the repose of his soul.

Reflection on Priest

After reading a post from Fr. Daren's blog (dzehnle.blogspot.com) from quite a while back (what can I say, I'm trying to catch up on the semester's-worth of blogs I haven't read), I ran upon a reflection on the person of the priest from my very own patron saint: St. Norbert.

Oh, Priest! who are you?

Not through yourself, since you are from nothing.

Not for yourself, since you are mediator of men.

Not to yourself, since you are the spouse of the Church,

Not yours, since you are servant of all,

Not you, since you are God.

Who are you then?

You are nothing, and all.

A Return to the Blogosphere?

Well, we'll see how far this goes, but I'm interested in starting to post on this wonderful thing slightly more frequently.

Now that I'm officially a college graduate, maybe I'll have more time on my hands! (Doubtful.)

I leave for Totus Tuus training on May 26th, so the time will be short when I have very little to do. But regardless, perhaps I'll find a little time to update this intensely exciting (heh heh...) blog every once in a while.

Oh yeah, I'm officially a seminarian for the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois now! I'll be headed to the University of St. Mary of the Lake/Mundelein Seminary in the fall! I can't wait!!!

The Silent Holocaust

Abortion is a problem that is very deeply rooted in the moral fabric of our country. America seems to view life as a expendable. Our warped views of sexuality lead to a mentality that sex is for pleasure and not necessarily for the purpose of creating life. We have separated the very purpose of sexual intercourse from the act. Things like contraception and abortion only add to the problem, encouraging those who weren't 'planning' on having children to decide that they simply won't, even if God had other plans for them.

There's obviously a lot to say on this topic, but I'm going to try to keep my thoughts focused. I recently re-watched a favorite video clip of mine: an abortion survivor named Gianna Jessen addressing the Parliament in Victoria, Australia. She has some very unique perspectives on the topic of abortion, almost hauntingly claiming that "The Silent Holocaust did not win over me," as well as some stellar thought-provoking lines. I'll give a few of them, but I really encourage you to watch the videos.

"I know in the age that we live in, it is not at all politically correct to say the name of Jesus Christ in places like this, to bring him into these sorts of meetings, because his name can make people so terribly uncomfortable...But I didn't survive so I could make everyone comfortable. I survived so I could stir things up a bit."

That reminds me of the quote from Pope Benedict XVI, "The world promises you comfort, but you were not made for comfort. You were made for greatness."

Attacking the claim that abortion violates women's rights: "If abortion is merely about women's rights, then what were mine? There was not a radical feminist standing up and yelling about how my rights were being violated that day. In fact, my life was being snuffed out in the name of women's rights."

And lastly, referencing the argument that children with the potential for disabilities should be spared from living a life of suffering, she states: "There are things that you will only be able to learn by the weakest among us. And when you snuff them out, you are the one that loses. The Lord looks after them, but you are the one that will suffer forever."

Like I said--a lot of thought-provoking stuff. If you've got 15 minutes free, take the time to listen to it. It'll definitely give you an interesting perspective on one of America's greatest spiritual battlefields.

Friendships on the Threshold of Change

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge people person. I've always said that my friends are my drugs, and I suppose that what I really mean is that one of the greatest ways I experience God is through my relationships with people.

After this summer, I was left questioning where some of my greatest friendships were going. You see, after my senior year of high school, I was very curious to see if my friends that I had grown so close to in high school would stay close. We seemed inseparable in high school, and despite the great excitement I felt for college, I couldn't help but feel as though I was leaving something else behind.

Much to my enjoyment, things didn't seem to change much after we all got in college. After the first couple of years of school, we seemed to remain close, and while our relationships were necessarily different because of our experiences away at school, we were all still able to come back home and build upon what we had always had.

However, after this past summer, I couldn't help but feel as though we were beginning to grow apart. Again, that's not necessarily a bad thing. And from what I could tell, most of it was healthy and natural. Many of us, including myself, were away with internships, summer jobs, and amazing opportunities for our futures. But being myself, I was slightly saddened by the fact that it was happening. Once the greatest of friends, we seemed to be drifting away.

As I came home for Thanksgiving break, I wondered to myself whether we would be together again. Not surprisingly, the night after we all arrived home, the mass invitation was sent out. I wondered how many of my friends would attend and whether things would be different, especially having not seen each other for nearly the entire summer.

Things were good. It's actually amazing for me to see how each of our lives are headed along different paths. Though we've experienced drastically different circumstances over the past few years, we are still able to come together and celebrate the relationships we began building so long ago. Sure, we're all different from the people we were in high school, but we've been able to embrace who we've become.

It did me a lot of good to be able to see our interactions after our time apart--to see how they've changed and how they've stayed the same. Whether a priest or a faithful lay person, I will inevitably be led to friendships with different people in different places in different periods of time in my life. I need to foster friendships with a healthy realization that friends do grow apart. However, I will always be a firm believer that our human relationships are a way to experience Christ in our earthly life. And as such, I look forward to every opportunity to invest myself in someone else's life. I look forward to every opportunity to catch up with an 'old' friend, to share an experience with another, and to build new relationships everywhere I go.

As graduation grows ever closer, I find myself thinking a lot about these things. Where will I be in a few years? Will I remain close with all of the people I know and love in college? If not, will I be presented with the opportunities to keep in touch? I find it very difficult to think that I may never see--or worse, speak to-=some of my greatest friends after I graduate. Nevertheless, I have full faith that God will provide for me. I must constantly remind myself that the friendships with which He has blessed me have greater purpose, and ultimately, I must carry with me the things that I have learned no matter where I go.

A Long Time Coming...

Well, I've been away from this for a while. Let that be a testament to how busy my semester has been. And that's no complaint. I absolutely love what I'm doing, at least 95% of the time. School has been a challenge this semester, mostly because of the difficulty of my classes, but aided by the fact that I cannot really see myself working as a chemical engineer in nearly any capacity. Don't get me wrong, I still actually kind of enjoy what I'm studying from time to time, and I wouldn't trade my time at the University of Illinois for anything, but it all keeps me praying for perseverance, to say the least.

Since I haven't written since September, it's easy to think of a lot of things that have gone unsaid in my blog. I'll try to bring out a few of the more important things, but I'll inevitably forget some very important things...

My brother has been seriously discerning religious life for a while now, and he finally made the move to get that process underway. This fall, he decided to drop his college classes, given that it was going to take him a significant amount of time to finish up his degree. He called Conception Abbey, which is the monastery that ran his seminary when he attended seminary college, and asked them what it would take. After some talking, they arranged for him to come and live with them for a month. He just got back tonight from working and praying with the Benedictines for a month, and I can only say that he's as happy as I've ever seen him. Hopefully, God willing, he'll be joining sometime after the beginning of the year. While I can't say that it won't be difficult to live so far away from my brother, I'm incredibly happy for him in every possible way. It's amazing to have an example in my life of someone who's so willing to radically follow God's call in his life. I only hope that I'm as willing to put aside my wants and desires and abandon myself so fully to God.

Aside from that, things in my life have been going pretty well. As of October 29th, I have officially applied to be a seminarian for the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois. I can't even say how great it felt to get the application finished. I felt like I was finally doing something about what I felt God had been writing on my heart for quite some time. Now I wait as they begin to review my application. Eventually I'll be called in for an interview and at some point I'll begin the process of applying to the seminary itself. Exciting times, no doubt. I just have to keep reminding myself to keep focused on my vocation at present, which is student.

The weekend after I turned in my application, I had the opportunity to visit the University of St. Mary of the Lake, Mundelein Seminary. My diocese sends to this school, along with a couple of others. The place is absolutely stunning. The grounds are gorgeous and the entire place breeds peace and serenity. The weekend I visited happened to be deaconate ordination, and I was blessed to be able to sing in the choir for the celebration. Afterwards at the hors d'oeuvres reception, a friend of mine who goes to Mundelein introduced me to some of the very important figures associated with the seminary. I shook hands with Francis Cardinal George and a couple of bishops, the rector of the seminary as well as a couple of the deans, and some very intriguing professors and religious. After somewhat of a whirlwind weekend, I was fortunate to get to spend some time in the main chapel and then driving around the lake. (Funny, my camera ended up deleting the pictures I took.)

I'm incredibly eager to get started with my discernment in seminary. I have a ways to go before I get there, but things are definitely coming together.

St. Charles Borromeo, pray for us!