The Love of a Mother

This morning I was struck by the example of St. Monica, whose feast we celebrate today. She was the mother of St. Augustine and an incredible intercessor on his behalf. The simple and yet profound witness of the saints continues to bowl me over from time to time, and St. Monica is no exception. As I was reading an excerpt from the Confessions of St. Augustine about his mother, I couldn't help but be amazed by the beauty of her statements to her son.

We desired with all our hearts to drink from the streams of your heavenly fountain, the fountain of life. That was the substance of our talk, though not the exact words. But you know, O Lord, that in the course of our conversation that day, the world and its pleasures lost all their attraction for us. My mother said: "Son, as far as I am concerned, nothing in this life now gives me any pleasure. I do not know why I am still here, since I have no further hopes in this world. I did have one reason for wanting to live a little longer: to see you become a Catholic Christian before I died. God has lavished his gifts on me in that respect, for I know that you have even renounced earthly happiness to be his servant. So what am I doing here?"

I'll tell you a couple of reasons why her testimony hit me. First, it speaks to me of how greatly a mother loves her son. I wonder sometimes whether that same love still manifests itself in our selfish culture--whether a mother's primary concern for her son is still the salvation of his soul, as it should be. I am also impressed by St. Monica's unceasing prayer for the sake of her son's conversion. St. Monica so obviously believed in the ability of God to convert her son and she would not stop pleading his cause until God answered. Our world seems to have lost its confidence in God's ability to actually effect something in this world. We pray for peace in the world, but do we actually believe that God can provide that? We pray for the healing of sick members of our family, but do we actually believe that God can provide those miracles? We pray for the conversion of the sinner, but do we actually believe that God can intervene in our lives and save our souls? Do we still believe that God can touch this world? Certainly, God will not grant it if we do not actually believe. The doubt of this world scares me sometimes, but St. Monica's witness provides a beautiful example of faith outshining that doubt.

St. Monica, pray for the conversion of this world. Amen.

My Spiritual Testament of Totus Tuus

At the end of our Totus Tuus experience this summer, we were asked to write a spiritual testament. Not knowing exactly what to write, I sat outside the Chiara Center on a beautiful summer day and petitioned God for His help. Inspired or not, this is what I wrote:

Serviam

God has led me to the doors of the Church, not looking inward, but outward to the world He has called me to serve. Through His grace which sustains, He has given me the faith by which to know His love and mercy.

So then, I am called to respond, to lay down my earthly life to serve the kingdom which my flesh could neither merit nor deserve, all for the sake of spreading Christ's Gospel.

"Yet I consider life of no importance to me, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to bear witness to the gospel of God's grace." (Acts 20:24)

I have been called to withdraw my desire of all earthly things, and yet in His kindness, His earthly creation constantly proclaims the glory due His name.

As I take up my cross and die to self, I know that I shall never be alone in doing so. With so great a crowd of witnesses as have gone before me, I am filled with gratitude for the example that has been and continues to be--the example of the Church. God, so intimately knowing His creation, has inspired in me a great love of humanity, and so blessed me with the gift of the Church, who in her majesty can never displace herself from the love of God. In fact, even before my fleshly existence, He knew of my need for His Incarnation--for His joining in my humanity--and so for my salvation, He sacrificed His only Son.

Thanks be to God for all that He has given me, none of which I deserve, but all freely given, for me, His chosen one.

A Summation of the Last Half of Totus Tuus

Admittedly, I've failed at keeping up the weekly Totus Tuus correspondence. Hopefully that means I was investing the extra effort into the youth of the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois...

The last half of the summer was incredibly busy and very intense. We went from St. Peter's in Quincy, which had the largest numbers of any parish this summer (85 day and 55 night!), to St. Francis Xavier in Jerseyville (not a small parish itself), to St. Agnes in Springfield (also pretty substantial), finally finishing up in Auburn at Holy Cross Parish.

Without going into much detail, I found that the last half of the summer was just as epic and grace-filled as the first (if not more). My teammates were all spectacular and I couldn't have asked for a better group of fellow missionaries. We worked hard this summer and hopefully contributed a little to the salvation of souls. I think I'll let prayer and the Holy Spirit take it from here...

Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception, Patroness of the Diocese of Springfield in Illinois, Pray for us!!